First of all, why are you closing threads after a single comment?
Second, I've also got a server, and I set mine up to be able to handle up to 10 people at once. I'm the only one who has ever played and built anything on it, and there is only one location where anything has been built. It's not a small build, but it's not massive either. There are only 5,281 building pieces, 138 placeables, and 6 thralls on the whole map, and there hasn't been a single day since I started the server that it has operated under the "max" RAM. It looks like there are 6GB allotted, and it's always at 6.2-6.7. My framerate is awful, and sometimes I just get disconnected for no apparent reason. I really enjoy playing this game, but it's becoming tedious with all the rubberbanding and stuff. I don't know what I'll do if ANYONE else joins and builds something.